Politics Pen

As a politics student, I'm always looking for unique ways of explaining political ideas to those who find the concept 'dull' or 'pathetic'. Recently, a doctor in England and philosopher explained the main political ideas in such a relevant way I just had to share. You may get a bit of a laugh, or it may provoke some thoughts about your own response to the ways of ideologies. Here it is:

Let's imagine we have two cows, to do what we want. They're fairly healthy, and ready to produce milk and whatever. Now we place these owned cows in different political climates, to see the cause and effect. Note, these aren't meant to be serious. It's supposed to be funny, bizarre and light hearted, with some element of truth:

In Socialism:

One cow is given to another family without a cow.

In Communism:

The State takes the cows and gives you the milk.

In Fascism:

The State takes the cows and sells you the milk.

In Capitalism:

The Government takes the cows and sells one for a goat, whilst shipping the other to a high produce factory. The economy fluctuates by the demand of milk and cheese, until both animals are overworked and the economy collapses.

In Liberalism:

The cows are earned their own individual right to live free.

In Darwinism:

The cows are a product of natural selection and we have no right to command their patterns of habit.

Nazism:

The State takes the cows and shoots you then works your family to death.

An Iraqui Houshold:

You don't have any cows, and you tell everyone that you don't have any cows. Hoever, everyone doesn't believe you and proceeds to bomb the crap out of your house. Whoops no cows. Oh well at least you're a democracy now...

In Surrealism:

You have two giraffes. The government requires you play harmonica and sit near bushes on weekends.

In a Democracy:

You and another party discuss and debate over the financial future of the cows, before using the public to vote. Years from now, instead of debating about cows, it will be gay marriage and obamacare and fox news will inflate your ego to gigantic proportions. Have fun!

In Environmentalism:

You understand the cows are living beings and let them go free, letting them multiply and going off the land and fresh milk. You successfully over-accommodate the cows and use population control when necessary to balance the ecosystem *claps*